Sunday, September 14, 2008
oh my god i speak words of doubt.

Oh my i doubt.


oh my i doubt.



oh my i doubt.



Im supposed to be tired after the special nights i spent
with my conscience as my eyes were opened throughout.

I dunno why but i get scared when i close my eyes
these few days.

I'd open my eyes in less than 15 minutes whenever i try to sleep.






i think im scared.
dun scare me.
im scared.
reali.
im scared.



this week, well...
been sleeping @ 4.30am and waking up at 5.15am
for early breakfast before fasting.
4.30 am lights out.


4.50 am eyes starts to close.



5.15am WAKE UP WAKE UP MY GOD THIS IS NOT A TEST




its.... about 5 days now.
OMG.
Im supposed to be dead by now.



I AM SUPPOSED TO BE TIRED.
TOM, BE TIRED NOW.
WHY ARENT YOU TIRED???
TIRED TIRED SLEEP SLEEP



Fasting's not making me any patient.
Im still an angry kidd.



WAT?
TOM?
TOM AN ANGRY KID?
are u like kidding me?
How can he be an angry kid when he
goes to library jus to hear nothing and read
books of self-improvement?
WTF? TOM AN ANGRY KID?



I have an identity crisis.
I dunno myself.



I think im very pretentious.
oh, its jus another way to say,

IM A FAKE.

like some guy I know who speaks super
accurate american slang eng and wear super weird wig to hide his bald head.
and live a life of lies.





Im a fake to the extent that i dun recognise myself.



I think everyone i met has a super different view of wat Tom is.


the people from class 04 probabli think that
im so quiet that i sometimes render myself invisible.
or they might think i hv a super unpredictable nature.

coz i go crazy in one second and turn invisible the next second


the people from BE club probabli think that
im a crazed maniac that spouts nonsense and
screams like a monkey with a sore throat while doing it.


the people from I go out to watch gigs with probabli think that im
a super happy-go-lucky guy that puts a smile on my face even when
a megaton of steel was dropped on my feet.


the people from reg class probabli think that
im an unpredictable guy that loves curtains.



its sucks when u dunn know yourself.
im so unpredictable even my relationships show



i wish i dun hv to mind my own business.


falling behind
stuck in my own world
falling behind
crazed. try to make sense of wat is possible.
no no no.
falling behind.



do something.
Pretend ur okay.
go.
go.
go.

♥/LiterallyTom/2:09 AM